THE FOOD RANT

I am not a vegetarian. I am not a vegan. I eat fish, so I suppose I'm a pescetarian, but since I despise shellfish and seafood and don't like to call myself one. I eat eggs. I eat dairy. I love cheese more than anything.
I just don't eat meat. Shouldn't be so complicated. But it is.

Being a non-meat eater in Norway totally sucks. Much like lactose- and gluten-intolerance, vegetarians are mostly being ignored. You'd be luck to find anything vegetarian on any menu, and if you do it's often just one option, usually with eggs and cheese, so I can only imagine how it must suck to be vegan.  

There's rarely veggie-options in the stores, soy and tofu is non-existent unless you happed to live in a big city with super-supermarkets. The most annoying part though, is that there is zero system for marking foodstuffs. I always think it's so amazing when I'm in England and there's a pretty green V on the stuff I can eat. That don't exist here. However, they've been able to mark tons of stuff with a stupid keyhole, because it's «a little bit healthier». Most pointless stuff ever. Gluten-intolerance is becoming more common as well (thank god I'm spared, but that doesn't mean I can't get it someday), and you'd think it'd be a good idea to write on stuff whether it contains gluten or not.  But no. 

Another issue I've had is with gelatine. I don't like it, it makes me feel sick but if I want candy it's completely unavoidable. I recently became aware of agar agar, and immediately looked online to find it. Found some at a Norwegian health food store, £20 for 50 grams. Seriously. I looked online, and found 500 grams for £5. Now, I order most things online anyways, like most people these days, but I wish it wasn't necessary. My latest quest is for some supergluten flour as it seems it's wonderful to use when making veggie burgers and stuff. (The Norwegian stores have some online, at about the same price as gold.)

Things might be changing, though. I was delighted to discover one of my favourite treats has exchanged the stupid gelatine for agar instead.  But come on. They should do that with everything. Norway has an increasing muslim-population, we have some jews as well, so it would only be good for business for Norwegian food producers to make stuff we all can eat.  

Jeez, I saw a program about jews in Norway and they had to bring the longest list ever of e-numbers to the store to make sure the stuff they bought was kosher. Like seriously. Like I mentioned earlier I eat fish, but I still have to read labels as they make fish cakes with bacon in them. There's a whole shelf of various instant just-add-water mini-meals in the supermarket, (pastas, soups, mashed potatoes and stuff), and there's meat in every. single. one. Not that I like those kinds of foods, but come on. It's the principle.

I make most stuff from scratch anyway, because it's fun and taste better, but if you're on any kind of special diet you kind of have to. Again, options are available, most stores are getting gluten-free shelves, but the problem is that stuff is quite pricey. I bought some soy burgers once, twice the price of normal burgers. I even managed to get fish-hot dogs once. They tasted just like regular hot dogs. For real. The texture was a little different of course, but they had the same smokey taste. Shouldn't be a problem to sell in stores, after all it's a healthier way for Norway to consume it's favorite food. If it hadn't been for the fact that they cost three times as much and had to be ordered in specially, of course. So I only bought them once, as I can't afford such luxury.

So I've never even considered veganism, as I wouldn't be changing my diet but giving up most of it.

Unless you're rich, you can basically forget about getting vegan cheese or vegan wine. Not to mention you should expect to be laughed at if you say you're a vegetarian. Either that, or people get mad at you.

The fact that the animals are suffering doesn't really work as an argument either, because most people don't care. But even people are suffering around the world because of meat production. In Argentina fruits and vegetables are too expensive for most people because most of the land is being used for meat production.

The planet is suffering because of meat production. And still veganism is referred to as ridiculous. Oy vey.

I'm Julie, a kosher-pescetarian. YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT, WORLD?